In a fit of madness, I decided to vacuum the house.
We bought our new vacuum almost a year ago, but I have never placed a single fingerprint on it during this time. It’s one of those whiz-bag Dyson machines that other housewives covet.
I plugged it in, but could see no obvious way to turn the machine on. The buttons on the handle appeared to do nothing.
I figured as it was so expensive, it must have Bluetooth. So I tried a few commands.
‘Machine on!’
‘Turn on!’
‘Start!’
‘Go!’
None worked.
Perhaps it would only respond to my husband’s voice?
Mr Sponge came to see who I was conversing with, and explained that vacuum cleaners had not advanced that far. Apparently to kick start the machine, all you need to do is turn the big red button on.
It sprang to life and off I whisked.
What I didn’t count on was having to move all 18 chairs that we now have in the home. And I had forgotten that cords only extend so far.
There were a few hairy moments such as when I pulled a powerboard out of the wall (and everything that was attached to it) in the kitchen.
Apparently it’s not normal to drag a boiling kettle around behind you when vaccumming.
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